Category Archives: Uncategorized

Introducing: Pitch or Putt

Welcome to a new section of the Blog – Pitch or Putt.

The premise is simple a statement is made which you either agree with (Pitch) or disagree with (Putt). Think “can I make this pitch shot, or do I need to put from off the green here?” And if you don’t think in golf terms – start.

It’s my hope to bring you an, at least, weekly Pitch or Putt to pontificate on.

#12’s Boob of the week for Janaury 29-February 04, 2012

This was an easy choice for me.  Last week Fox News (fair and balanced) ran a story about a 48 year old man legally adopting his 42 year old girlfriend in order to reduce his overall financial worth.  I won’t get too much into the details, the 48 years old man, John Goodman, is being sued in a wrongful death civil suit and a judge ruled that trusts established for John’s two biological children could not be considered part of his financial worth.  So he legally adopts his girlfriend, further reducing his financial worth in hopes that he would lose less money in the civil suit.  The wrongful death he is being sued for the death of a 23 year old man, whom Goodman killed in an automobile accident when Goodman ran a stop sign.  This dude is a total boob.  However, his attorney is just as big a boob as he said about the adoption that, “It has nothing to do with the lawsuit currently pending against him,” and said the adoption was to secure family stability.  Everyone looks like a boob in this case, at least everyone one Goodman’s side.  But I hope one person will not have boobish actions in this case, the judge.  I hope she doesn’t allow this new adoption and trust to not be counted as part of Goodman’s financial worth.  If I was the judge and saw what he was trying to do, I would make sure he was sentenced to pay the maximum amount.  I hope this judge feels the same way regarding John Goodman’s boobish actions.

The Fox News story can be read here: http://www.foxnews.com/us/2012/02/01/florida-businessman-adopts-adult-girlfriend-as-his-daughter/

LeBron James, Before Watchmen, and Right-vs-Wrong

The last two years have seen a great deal of energy spent trying to explain why LeBron James’ moving from Cleveland to South Beach was wrong.  While at this very moment nerds around the world are typing the QWERTY off their keyboard, raging against the prequels to Alan Moore and Dave Gibbon’s Watchmen.

These two events are very different.  They are separated by subject matter, time, space, intellectual property law, and an array of other details, to many to list.  But these ire-inducing incidents also share some common ground, they’re both morally ambiguous and entirely lawful.

LeBron James acted within his rights as a Free Agent, and it’s clear that DC Comics is entitled to create stories containing characters owned by their own company.

No laws are being broken, and nothings at stake in either of these situations that rises to the level of moral outrage.  At the end of the day we’re not talking about abortion, or sex slavery, or even war.  It’s just funny books and B-ball.

It’s this legal clarity and moral insignificance that makes these things so hard to define.  There’s nothing to hang ones hat on when hating.  When something’s legal and it’s neither good nor bad, how do you know whether it’s right or wrong?

Our guts tell us that it’s not right for LeBron to team up with his friends and stack the deck, but there’s others who simply see a man making his own way in the world, choosing his own path.

Certain nerds have experienced a visceral reaction to Watchmen being built upon.  They feel as though nothing can be added to this complete project without marring the material, while there comic-reading compatriots just see the chance for more raging Rorschach.

What is one to do?  How do you find and support an argument for something that seems wrong, but isn’t bad or illegal?  Why is LeBron a bad guy?  Why shouldn’t DC make some more money?  What do you think, and why?

Right or Wrong,
TheLongTalk

Cargument Arguement of the Week

Given the ability to move freely through either time or space, which would be your choice and why?

TheLongTalk’s Take:

Sure traveling through space looks like a blast on television, but the sad truth is that space is mostly cold, black nothing… and then more nothing… and wait, what’s that over there… more nothing.

So even if TheLongTalk could move freely, zipping from star-to-star and planet-to-planet in an instant… it’d probably just be one empty, uninhabitable world after another.  No sexy green chicks, no cool laser gun fights, just more and more endless emptiness.

Which is the exactly why TheLongTalk would choose moving freely through time.  Sure TLT might miss out on making First Contact, or some magic alien world beyond compare, but at least I’d have the assurance that something would happen.

We know that 1963 happened, that 1824 was a year on this world in which people walked about… and we can sort of guess that 2028 will happen… although forward traveling could end badly.

Time travel does have it’s dangers, not the least of which is the Butterfly Effect (it’d be a shame to have to see that movie again) but at least something recorded exist to check out.  Space is just a crapshoot.

To the time machine,
TheLongTalk

New Year Resolutions

The Cargument: New Years Resolutions, Yay or nay?

TheLongTalk wrote:
TheLongTalk hasn’t made a New Year’s Resolution in years, but that doesn’t mean he’s against it. TLT likes the idea of trying to improve ones self, even if the practice isn’t always put into practice.

TheLongTalk once heard Will Smith say something about, if it’s important enough to make a resolution then it’s important enough to start on right away… why wait till New Year’s. But we can’t all be Will Smith and some people need the New Year to kick start a change that yes, they might have needed to make sooner. But as long as the change gets made right.

And to those that say a New Year’s Resolution is just setting yourself up for failure… so. People fail all the time, at least you’ve tried.

That’s the LongTalk’s take.

#12 Wrote:
– I love the idea of New Year’s resolutions in December. I hate them in February, well actually sometimes I hate them in January. I look back at old journals or Word documents and see all I wanted to do but haven’t. Kinda depressing. So maybe my resolution should be to keep my resolutions. Also, I think I’ll limit my resolutions to a maximum of 5 realistic resolutions. Anyways, I agree with the TheLongTalk, I’m a fan of New Year’s resolutions, but I think making goals might be a better way to go.

Don’t make a resolution to loose weight. Make a goal to weigh 10 less pounds by June. Don’t make a resolution to spend more time with the kids. Make a goal to turn off the T.V. and go outside and play with your kids an hour a day. Yup, I think goals, is the way to go. So this year make goals that are achievable and set a date for yourself to check your goals and see how you are doing.

Thanks for listening, or reading I suppose…

#12

Roadto90 wrote:
As much as it pains me to say so, I’m pretty with in agreement with both TheLongTalk and #12 on this one.

I remember a couple years ago I made some resolutions, and I hit a decent amount of them. Part of the problem was that the resolutions weren’t terribly meaningful (train the dog, beat some video games, etc.) While it feels great at the moment to achieve each resolution, that feeling definitely doesn’t perpetuate throughout the year.

I definitely like #12’s decision on picking meaningful goals. “Be a better person” is so open-ended and vague. “Stop lying” is more concrete and “easier” to work on, since you have a solid target.

I think the big problem with resolutions is that the minute people can’t/don’t keep them, they tend to give up on them. I say, “get back on the horse.” And if you want to make a change in March, do it. Don’t use 01/01 as an excuse as to why you’re not bettering yourself.

iPad

I was going to start a cargument about what table/ereader was the best. But after getting an iPad and using it to write this blog I’ve decided there is no argument. Wouldn’t you agree RT90?

Random Movie Ideas

I Feel Like CRAB! The CRAB flies, July 4th
Family Features, PG 13

A boy (Ryan Lee – Super8) leaves his house late one night to get away from the sound of his parents fighting.    Before long he finds himself lost beyond hope in a magical and dangerous world, worse yet he’s slowly turning into a fiddler crab!

– – –

BAZONGAS No words ever looked this good.
Art House Pictures, NC 17

Self-help Guru Tom Chambers (Ryan Gosling) finds he’s less than satisfied with the path his life has taken, unit he coins the phrase, “Bazongas” to describe a woman’s breast.
This simple turn of phrase leads him deep into the twisted world of Intellectual Property Law and on an exciting race Around the World in an effort to cash in on the next BIG thing.

– – –

Anna’s Treasure A Tyler Perry Film
HARPO STUDIOS, PG 13

When underemployed, under-sexed, Anna Tracker (Jada Pinkett Smith) hits it rich playing a three state PowerBall, she finds out quickly how much fun life can really be.

But disaster waits just around the corner as her family, her friends, and even her new beau (Will Smith) begin playing psychological games in an effort to get their hands on Anna’s Treasure.
But could it be her real treasure is something more than mere money?

– – –

Jimmy Bond
Danger is his Father’s middle name
reNEWvate STUDIOS, PG 13

Nepotism has never been so dangerous as the smooth, but woefully unqualified, Jimmy Bond takes over the family business.

International incidents, sexual harassment charges, parking tickets, alcohol poisoning, and an overly friendly East German weightlifting champion are only a few of the hurdles this Bond will have to clear as he works to be worthy of his 00 status.
And learns a little something about love.

Just some ideas,
TheLongTalk

Boob of the Week – Local Walmart

I’d like to start this post by saying that I just found out that Walmart is spelled that way. I always thought it was WalMart or Wal Mart.

Getting back on track, my Boob of the Week award goes to my local Walmart store for this past week’s midnight release of Call of Duty: Black Ops.

The story goes a little something like this. I made a last minute decision to “experience” a midnight video game release, and since I didn’t feel like driving to the closest mall, I figured Walmart would suffice. What could go wrong? I didn’t anticipate the amount of interest in the game.

A buddy of mine and I go to the store around 11:30 or so, to find a huge line awaiting us. At that point I just hoped that  I wouldn’t be waiting in line for half an hour for nothing.

The magic hour struck. It was midnight! The line began moving but at an awfully slow pace. The line continued to move at a snail’s pace, and when I finally got close enough to the video games section, I learned why.

Walmart, land of a million (ok, ok 20) registers had 1 – count them – 1 register open for the release! ONE! For a line of 100, give or take, people they had 1 register open.

I cannot for the life of me figure out why. I know they have a strict video game policy as to where you can purchase them, etc., but come on, open some more registers for a special occasion!

Local Walmart, you are this week’s Boob of the Week!

Preseaon Precog

TheLongTalk’s NBA Preseason Predictions

With #12 doing an NFL Preseason Prognostication, TheLongTalk felt he was required to do the same for the NBA.  So here are TLT’s NBA 2010-2011 Predictions.

- Eastern Conference

1. Miami – Easy pick considering LeBron was #1 last season without Wade or Bosh
2. Orlando – They’ll try for awhile and then give up on #1 and settle in
3. Chicago – If Boozer can stay healthy, which is a big IF
4. Boston – But only because of seeding requirements for Division Winners
5. New York – TLT expects something BIG to happen in the Big Apple
6. Atlanta – Same team that took #3 last year, stiffer competition this year
7. Milwaukee – Centers getting healthy and PG is due for a sophomore injury
8. Philadelphia – Just barely getting by Charlotte and Indy

Missing The Cut –

9. Charlotte
10. Indiana
11. Wizards
12. Pistons
13. Nets
14. Cleveland
15. Toronto

The East will be hard to watch with 3 teams playing hard and everyone else on auto-pilot.  But expect a late season scramble with Washington, Philly, Charlotte, and Indy all finding themselves in striking distance of the 7th and 8th spots.

- Western Conference

1. Dallas – A solid team that will take advantage of LA’s restful attitude
2. Utah – Jerry Sloan teams are always good and they should win their Division
3. Lakers – They can’t prove anything by winning the regular season
4. San An – TLT expects a tight season out of this young team
5. Oklahoma – Kevin Durant is no longer under anyone’s radar
6. Portland – If they can stay healthy and that’s a big IF
7. Phoenix – Rumors of The Suns demise have been greatly exaggerated
8. Houston – With a healthy Yao and a distracted, possibly traded Anthony

Sorry, But Try Again Next Year –

9. Hornets
10. Denver
11. Clippers
12. Sacramento
13. Memphis
14. Golden State
15. Minnesota

The West will be wild with OK making a push and LA relaxing and resting for a deep Playoff run.  TheLongTalk expects Anthony to be moved around the trade deadline and for San An’s fresh legs to make a HUGE difference.

- Playoff Predictions
It’s so early and so much can happen with trades, injuries, etc…  but here’s how TheLongTalk thinks it’ll shake out.

- East Coast
Miami to the Eastern Conference finals, eliminating the Celtics easily in the Second Round.  Orlando has a bit more trouble, showing some Fear for the Deer in Round 1, but ultimately winning in 6 and taking down Chi-Town in 7.

Winner: Miami over Orlando in 6

- West Coast
The Spurs break ABC and the NBA’s hearts by bouncing the new golden child in Round 1.  Then they take out Houston who just upset the #1 seeded Mavericks who become infamous for losing to an 8th seeded team… TWICE.  Lakers take out Portland 4-0, then hand Utah a 4-1 series lose.

Winner: Lakers over Spurs in 6

- NBA Championship
With a little help from his friends Dwayne and Chris, and a whole lot of help from the referees, The King gets his crown… but he does it with Kobe on the sidelines nursing a “bad” knee.

Miami over LA in 6
So there’s your run down for 2010-2011 for the NBA, try to look surprised when it happens exactly like TheLongTalk said it would.

See you in a 100 or so games,
TheLongTalk